to the ones I could have lived for (in loving memory of Shawnee Redman)

Out of the familiar woods, we walk along the bottom of an ocean. Here live things that represent the part of my world which I feared. Here live the parts of me that kept me silent, as well as what guided me through the illusion of an abyss, and so I walk with my companions to hear the roar of a schism; the representation of a familiar behavior. Those beside me fear her, but even the wise are foolish enough to be intimidated. Only those who have lived next to the kindness this schism represents understand what she intends as her jaws open. I’m reminded of those, past and present, who made me feel special. In truth, those intimidating jaws smile at you, and the confusing colors are an invitation to walk alongside as she swims. She represents those strange, kind faces that held my hand in the hardest of times, and pushed me in the times I had underestimated myself. She represents the souls who reached out to me when I was too afraid to. I kneel to this creature, remembering those kind faces, and knowing that I still see them. I see them in the eyes of my loved ones, and the glances of faceless beasts I can now call friends today because of their trust in a stranger like me. It’s because of her reminder that I know I will never be alone as long as I continue to travel. And as I shed a tear and a familiar hand touches my shoulder, I stand and continue out of the abyss and into the future.