Does this composition work?

[Laurel Sternberg]

After working on it almost every day for a month, I can't view it objectively. Thanks.

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[Michael Pointer]

The composition doesn't work for me. It is very top heavy subject-wise. The lower right two'thirds is inactive. It was a nice attempt to create meaningful space with the red zigzag element in the rug but then I wondered how much the painting was about the rug. I think you know that the figures could be placed better and a more obvious use of leading lines employed or you would not be questioning the composition. It might be improved by increasing the light source values of the Right side face and lowering the overall values of the lower right third. There is little compositional connection between the three figures. I think you have shown marvelous technical ability and I will be interested in seeing the final image.

[Laurel Sternberg]

Thanks, Michael, I appreciate your specific recommendations. I was going for a triangular composition, indicated by the three bright hats and the three pitchers. Also, there is a line connecting the figures, in the embroidering on their robes. Would it help if I made that a little more prominent, especially on the blue robe?

[Linda Whelan]

This composition does not really work for me, as I feel there is a void between figures, which creates a hole in the painting.

Perhaps if the figure in dark blue clothing was leaning forward and a diagonal was created, this difficulty could be resolved.I think the colours are beautiful, and I love the Delacroix feeling implied in image.Interesting work.

Linda Whelan 

[Laurel Sternberg]

Thanks for your reply, Linda. I think I"ll try adding lighter, more prominent pattern to the blue robe on the sleeve and hem. Perhaps the blue robe should be lighter than the background, so it doesn't give the 'hole' effect.